Healing a Broken Heart

We are communicating about the current issues in our relationship but nothing is changing. I’m getting tired of feeling like everything goes in one ear and out the other. I just want to stop talking and caring because its exhausting.
We have a child together.

You cannot change someone if they do not want to change. The only thing you can control is your reaction to that person. Try reacting in a different manner – you may be surprised at the result!

We’ve been dating for just about a year now and have had a pretty smooth relationship, save our one big problem: internet gaming. I hate games like WoW and Everquest and he simply can’t get enough. Rather, he’s completely addicted. He’s since quit but now has what we call "attacks" nearly every day. He gets depressed and moody for long periods of time most of the time resulting in a minor argument or me in tears because I’m scared I’ve forced him to change. However, I still stand firm that if he’s addicted he shouldn’t be playing. He doesn’t think he is, but can’t be happy without the stupid game. How can I save us?
I know one year is not long term. However, we’ve already discussed long term plans (i.e. living together, possible proposal, etc). So by long term I mean, we’re going to be together for a long period of time, possibly even till death do us part.

He is actually addicted. I have psychology degree so I’m not just flying by the seat of my pants.

I’m not co-dependent and have plenty of my own hobbies.

He has a large amount of hobbies he has replaced the gaming with. The problem is he still suffers from depression due to this game.
And no, I am not a family marriage therapist. I work with little kids, so this is completely out of my range.

He has to save himself in order to save the relationship. You arent the one with addiction so there is NOTHING you can do do to save the relationship. You have to convince him to get help. Its either your those damn games. Tell him to cut back on his playing time. If he cuts back a little each day then he will eventually stop being addicted. Why dont you both take up a hobby together, that way he isnt playing video games and you two can have time together.

My husband is bipolar and his moods seem to be getting worse. I notice that he is deceptive to people and "wants what he wants". It seemed to worsen about 5 years ago when we had a major trauma in our family that has been resolved, but he shut his feelings down. Some advice would be appreciated. Thanks, Jgopherjj.

To answer the question: Sometimes (just like any other people).
To address your situation: Is your husband under the care of a psychiatrist? If not, it is imperative that he establish a good working relationship with a doctor he can fully trust–don’t be afraid to shop around. Sometimes at least two professionals are needed, the psychiatrist to prescribe meds and another person to help the patient live with the condition (e.g. a psychologist) If he is already seeing someone, might you be able to come to one of his appointments? This might be the most constructive way to express your concerns. I suspect the "major trauma" hasn’t actually been resolved since it has had a lasting impact on your husband (and since you bring it up). Psychotherapy and/or homeopathy could be helpful here if he’s receptive. I think the main hurdle with bipolar people is getting them to acknowledge and eventually embrace and learn to work with disorder, but I can’t tell from your posting where in this process your husband might be. Good luck to you both.

Me and this girl broke up after 3 1/2 months. (I 29 she 25) Initially she told me that she lost the spark. She wanted to remain friends. I kept asking her i wanted her back because my heart said dont let her go. We fought over the next 3 weeks about getting back. She said things like you cant force it, give it time, etc.. Then she started to call me a crazy person cause i persisted and i know i did. Last night i get a text from her telling me the reasons for a break up. My charm got old. She was no longer attracted to me cause she is way outta my league, she felt i was buying her love and my asskising got sicking and now she says she will never be friends now and wants nothing to do with me. I think i pushed her to far. Will she ever talk to me again. Has anyone ever had someone talk to them again after something like this. I really just want to be friends. Any advice thanks
She just had gotten out of a 2 1/2 year verbally abusive relationship ending in a restraning order. Am i a rebound? lol She told me initially that she lost feelings and still wanted to be friends. Just to give her time. Now she assumed that i lied to her about things and that i tried to fool her during our relationship. She thought i was doing drugs, i was trying to buy her love etc. I was not doing drugs and i told her that i want to prove to her. Her reasoning to give me reasons was that she did not want me to have the satisfaction of thinking i fooled her. Is she nuts?
She also told me not to try to prove myself different then what she called me. She called me a liar and would never want to be my friend. I didnt lie, just acted extra nice cause i did not want to lose her, that was my mistake. I told her that i want to be friends when she was ready and she told me no thanks. Can she reallt stay mad at me forever when we both agreed we had a good relationship??? ANY ADVI

As much as it hurts, yes, yes she can not be friends with you anymore and no, she’s not nuts. I understand where she’s coming from, actually. I was in a nearly identical situation. Pushing her to get back together with you for THREE WEEKS is far, far too much. If she didn’t want to get back together the first week, why would it change in the third? All you did was push her away. When you wanted to be friends, you might have been ready and she might not have been. You have to let her come to terms herself. Especially if she really thought all those things, she probably wanted to allow herself some time and distance to get over those things so she wouldn’t have to break it to you and be rude like that. But by constantly badgering her you didn’t give her that space and time, and what she did is final and no, don’t expect to be friends with her. I’m sorry.

so i was with this guy for 2 months,
but now he broke up with me and im hurt sooooo bad!
he broke up with me cause he moveing like 2 hours away
and he cant deal withlong distance relationships
i wanna stay with him so bad! but idk if i should try to get him back
he didnt seem upset about breaking up with me
yet he was always saying he loves me!
hes VERY stressed lately.
do u think that could be one of the reason he broke up with me?
hes comming to say goodbye monday((he moves tuesday))
and he said to call him sometime this week
should i call him today or give him some time?
how can i get him back?!
and if i dont get him back any advice on healing a broken haart?
*sorry my spelling sucks! i was tryin to write this really fast!*

I know what you are feeling.the reason he told you is not the truth at all why he broke up with you.2 HOURS is not true long distance.You need to ask him to tell you the truth.why did he broke up with you.then decide if you believe him or not.It will take you a while to get over him.But you will find someone better then him.take sometime for yourself to figure out what you want and need.just give yourself some tie and then you will get better.

Shanda makes Scoop sit down for weekly couples communication day! Scoop Hates Wednesdays!!

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watch this video over again until you’re ready to read my full honest review: http://www.makeyourexwantyou.com/the-magic-of-making-up-review.php
This video might not be enough to save your relationship, but there are always more free advice for you at: http://www.makeyourexwantyou.com

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Yazawa Ai’s extremely popular manga comes to life in Nana, the exciting new film starring popular singer Nakashima Mika and Miyazaki Aoi! Released in 2005 Nana tells the story of two twenty-year-old women with the same name, but drastically different personalities.
First up, there’s Osaki Nana (Nakashima Mika), a calm, cool, and collected punk rock singer who struts into Tokyo’s underground punk scene looking to hit the big time. While Nana’s got some ex-boyfriend issues that she’s eager to put behind her, she won’t allow that personal drama to interfere with her big dream. In fact, Nana’s not going to stop until she’s conquered Japan as the nation’s top rock star! The other “Nana” of the title is Komatsu Nana (TV actress Miyazaki Aoi), who is alternatively called Hachi. Cute and cheerful, Hachi led a somewhat sheltered life and has a bad habit of falling in love too quickly. She had some relationship problems in the past, but when she falls for her high school pal Junko, she decides to follow him to Tokyo when he gets admitted to an art design school. By moving to the big city, she hopes to find love and happiness in this new locale.

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Chauntel and Robert explains what steps to take after you’ve experience the breakup. You need closure?? Watch!
askchauntel@gmail.com

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This is my advice for when love doesn’t last and you’re left to pick up the pieces… step by step tools of what to do

see last nights live broadcast
http://www.tonyatko.com/live

Get your questions ready for teen week
TonyaTko

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